heartcramp:

Look, if you nicely tell me that swearing makes you uncomfortable and you politely ask me not to, I will stop immediately and speak nicer than a nun.

But if you start acting like you’re on some fucking high horse, or telling me that I’m going to Hell for talking the way that I do and you can’t “be around that kind of language” then you can bet your motherfuckin’ ass that I’ll be fucking cussing like a cunt-fuckin’ sailor you maggot-ridden piece of dick.

(via myvanityisavirtue)

Source: heartcramp

isurvivedthekobayashimaru:

I was at walmart the other day, and I was sitting on a bench waiting for my mom to pay, and I was braiding my hair because that’s something I do when I’m bored, and this dude walks by and says, “hey baby, what else can you do with your hands?” I gave him my most polite smile and said in the sweetest way possible, “strangle you.”

And I think I actually scared him because his eyes got kind of wide and he just walked away.

(via myvanityisavirtue)

Source: shesdonejim

  • Anxiety: hey!
  • Me: what now?
  • Anxiety: Nothing, just wanted to worry you today.
  • Me: ...great
  • Anxiety: Hey your boyfriend/girlfriend didn't text you back, they're probably with someone else right now.
  • Me: ....
  • Anxiety: Oh your best friend hasn't spoken to you today either. They're probably sick of your shit.
  • Me: ....
  • Anxiety: Your parents said they're really proud of you..do you honestly believe that?
  • Me: ....
  • Anxiety: Where do you see yourself in a year? Oh wait, you can barely get through a day!
  • Me: ...shut up.
  • Anxiety: Will you ever rise to anything?
  • Me: Shut up!
  • Anxiety: Or are you always this pathetic? Lol
  • Me: Why can't you leave me alone!?
  • Anxiety: Because messing with your head is what I live for.

Source: empty-hearted-wanderers

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